Posted on by Phil Strawn

The Cactus Patch Has Had Enough Of Texas…For A While


Hitch up the wagons, load the party bus, and roll em out…

I’m kidding of sorts, we don’t own a wagon or a bus anymore, but the Honda CRV is a good substitute, and it has air conditioning and practically drives itself. It’s been over a hundred degrees here for a month. I’m not talking about a mere pansy-assed 100 degrees; we’re talking real temperatures, like, 105-110, and that’s without a heat index thrown in that makes it feel like a visit to Hell On Wheels Texas in Satan’s un-airconditioned tour bus. MoMo and I are escaping and going to Ruidoso, New Mexico, this week. The land of enchantment, cool air, majestic mountains, and high rental rates. Hoping to see Deer, Elk, Bear, and Aliens if we stop in Roswell. Since the pot is legal in New Mexico, and Ruidoso has a large collection of cute little shops selling the evil weed, we will likely see many old hippie-type folks stumbling around town or cleaning out the Hostess cupcake aisle at “The Walmart.” The last time we were there, MoMo purchased some gummies made in the shape of Willi Nelson’s head, and they messed up my head badly. They were supposed to relax you and let you sleep like a baby.. naturally. At least that’s what the cute little Pot-a-rista told us. All I heard for two days was ” On The Road Again” and “Red-Headed Stranger,” and that was in my head, no music playing. I’m taking ample Irish Whiskey this time. At least if I stumble and fall from the whiskey, I won’t think it’s a revelation or a sign from above and say, “Wow, that was far-out; let’s do it again.”

Aliens eating Egg-A-Muffins and happy meals…

On the last trip to Ruidoso, we stopped in Roswell, New Mexico, UFO, and Alien Central. Having breakfast in the local Mcdonald’s downtown, a short walk to the Alien Museum, was a treat. The place’s interior is all UFO design with a play area shaped like a saucer. There was no shortage of strange people in the place. One homeless alien was taking a sink bath in the men’s restroom, and another ratty alien was begging for money in the parking lot. As we left, MoMo got excited because she spotted a little alien walking with some Earth Pod People. We stopped to gawk and realized It was a five-year-old big-headed kid in spider man pajamas walking with his parental units. She was bummed out. I told her not to worry keep believing because they will be here soon. Turns out, they are here and have been for quite a while now. She’s scared.

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15 Replies to “The Cactus Patch Has Had Enough Of Texas…For A While”

  1. We’ve never been to Ruidoso. But, back in January 2010, we spent the night in a motel in Carrizozo after visiting the museum in Roswell, which came on the heels of a walk through Carlsbad Caverns. Prior to the caverns, we’d visited the Alamo in San Antonio, where we paid tribute to Thomas R. Miller of Gonzales, Texas to whom I’m supposedly related.

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    1. Well, you were real close, about 60 miles from Roswell. Carrizozo is a nice village as is Roswell. We’ll likely visit the Alamo in the fall. They are making improvements and adding to make like the original layout. Family search says I am related to Davy Crockett, way on down the line of course. If you like Texas history, and the Alamo, read “The Gates Of The Alamo” by the great Stephen Harrigan. It’s a novel about the people that fought there, how they got there, and what happened to the ones that lived. Great read. Give my respects to Mr. Miller, anyone that fought and died there, has my utmost respect. Men of honor, all.

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    1. Going Northwest from here. Elevation 6900 ft. in the Sierra Blanca Mountains. Highs in the mid 80s this time of year. Yippie…better than 109 in the shade.Going to the Dakotas next summer to see Mt. Rushmore and the battleground where Custer got plugged.

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  4. Yea that is unbearable heat for that long of a time. I bet the electric company is about to pillage bank accounts everywhere because of the constant AC. Have a cool trip and look for a Jimi Hendrix edible…Purple Haze would fit the mood better.
    They sell gummies where I am…they are lovely at times.

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  5. Once again, Cowboy, be keerful out there. Have a grand old (cool) time. If you’re away from the pains and perils of WP while relaxing, I’ll catch you on the return fly.

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