A Tall Texas Tale For Those With Wrinkles…

Pictured above is none other than my childhood neighbor, Mrs. Mister, pouring her revolutionary beauty concoction, “Mrs. Mister’s Transforming Beauty Soak And Wrinkle Eradicator,” into the swimming pool at Colonial Country Club in Fort Worth, Texas, circa 1956. After emptying the last magnum of this magical elixir into the pool, every female club member over the age of fifty plunged into the water and adamantly refused to emerge until they attained Mrs. Mister’s enviable wrinkle-free appearance. Admittedly, a few of them came close to the mark, but, alas, the majority remained, shall we say, in dire need of further miraculous intervention.
Being the shrewd entrepreneur she was, Mrs. Mister struck a deal with Avon and pocketed a tidy sum for her creation. The miracle potion was rebranded as “Avon Skin So Soft,” renowned not only for its beautifying properties but also for its ability to repel those pesky “no-see-um” gnats. After all, why not fend off insects and look fabulous while doing so?
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Speaking of gnats, my house has been invaded for the first time ever. I’ve put out two shallow bowls containing apple cider vinegar, sugar, dish washing liquid, and warm water. These gnat traps work, but the pesky critters, which love to hover around your face in hopes of exploring your nasal passages, just keep on procreating. Maybe I need to buy myself a batch of “Mrs. Mister’s Transforming Beauty Soak And Wrinkle Eradicator.” If I can’t kill ’em all, at least I can keep those nasty gnats away from my face!
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In Texas we have what’s called no-see-ums, so small, yet bite so hard. Skin So Soft keeps them away, not sure how to kill the little demons. Mrs. Mister didn’t have that problem.
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It’s an interesting picture. I suspect Mr. Mister was a sneaky fellow because his wife is a dead ringer for Jayne Mansfield, who tried to have her way with me once, but I escaped with my virtue intact.
Let’s see you top that one …
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And use a picture of Mrs. Mister to market it.
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Growing up through puberty living next door to Mrs. Mister would have been an accelerator.
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We moved away when I was ten, so I missed all that, but my buddies didn’t.
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That was kinda tragic…a minute of silence for Phil’s lost puberty.
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Missed this earlier. How’d that happen?
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Not sure, this one’s been out there a while. Gotta love Mrs. Mister.
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