As some of you know, I had, and now, still have a Rodent, Rat, Mouse, or something more vile living within the depths of my wife, Momo’s, favorite thing: her hot tub.
We’ve removed most of the foam from inside, found the tubes the little critter chewed to obtain water, and have a friend who is a plumber who plans to replace the damaged parts in a week or so.
Now the Hantavirus, or the Black Plague, is going around, Good Lord Almighty, another pandemic? Mouse poop is going to wipe out the country?
Those folks on that tour ship must have ingested some in their Ceaser salad while gorging at the buffet. There is a substantial amount of Rat poop inside the hot tub, so there must be more than one, possibly a family with relatives.
I did the inhumane, unthinkable, and poisoned the little Rat with some guaranteed tasty and effective bait. Yesterday, he was lying down, breathing hard, and in a spot I could reach with my wife’s Martha Stewart Cooking Tongs. I figured he was about to go to Ratland, so I would wait out the expiration, but this morning, he or she has vanished. It’s unlikely a Rat Rapture happened, so he is either deeper in the tub or has crawled away to croak in a more natural and serene setting in the woods that surround my home.
My cousin and I used to sit in my grandparents’ barn and shoot the Rats with our Daisy BB Guns, killing a few now and then, but developing a keen eye for shooting fast-moving targets. Now I’m back to square one: find the Rat, dig more foam, put on a Hazmat suit, and finish vacuuming up the foam pieces and the Rat poop. I’m seriously considering having someone haul the tub away, Rat and all, or purchasing a 410 Shotgun and gettin er’ done.
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Notes From The Cactus Patch 
Many farmers use rat terriers to eliminate their vermin problem. Good luck restoring Momo’s hot tub and making it ratless/poopless. 🙂
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I’m going to wrap the entire tub in wire mesh and electrify it.
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🤣🐁🐀⚡️
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I read this to hubs and he enjoyed, Phil. Good luck with your mission!
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The mission is on again, and with furious determination fueling the seeds of culmination.
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Rat Rapture! 😂
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Nancy, it could happen, right? I hate Rats.
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Phil, I’ve never seen a rat outside of a pet store. Now mice…yes I’ve seen and plenty. We live in the middle of 3 acres of woods…so yes we will get them in winter quite a bit. The traps come out then. We also have squirrels galore…but no prairie dogs.
We ended up chopping our hot tub up and throwing it away in pieces…same thing…but I believe it was squirrels.
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Max, I’m giving it one more try, then like you, sawzall and to the dump. I had not seen a Rat until this past winter, and we live on an acre wooded lot in the country. Now, Squirrels, we have a few pesky ones, but we keep them occupied with Peanuts. Rattle snakes and Copperheads are all over the place right now, so at night, we don’t step off our lighted patio or go to deep into the woods. We have a family of Roadrunners living in the woods so they take care of most of the snakes, which they love to kill and eat.
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Rattle snakes, Copperheads, and the worse (to me) those dang Cottonmouths…are all over here. I didn’t know that about Roadrunners…that is great!
I saw a black racer the other day…I like those snakes…they will eat Rattle snakes.
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We live at the north end of the hill country, lots of woods, hills, rocky outcroppings etc, perfect home for snakes, and this year they are everywhere.
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You are a valiant warrior, Phil! I sincerely feel your pain. We had a rat family take up residence in the insulation of the freezer that was on our back porch in Monterey. Ugh. The grossest.
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I may have gotten the last of the family, but the wooded area around my house is teaming with critters. The feral cats in the area are a big help. Cherry Bombs and 410 shotgun are my last resort. I think this entire Hantavirus is another Pandemic ploy. Growing up, our house had mice, who didn’t in the 1950s? We never got the virus. I’ve removed most of the hard foam insulation from inside the guts of my tub so there’s not much housing left.
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Wait, hold on, just a galldern minit; where’s the cherry bombs?
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It’s a battle, but I will remain diligent and triumph in the end. As long as I don’t get the plague or worse. Cherry Bombs are my last resort if I have to dismantle the darn thing.
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So this rat was an actual rodent, not a DemocRAT?
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Yes, a big one, fat with a long tail. It did remind me a bit of that governor of Illinois.
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I know it would soothe your soul to blow it up, but my neighbor blew up the rotting old camper in his woods, and that’s how all the rats in it invaded both of our houses. You know where they are; you have one up on them, at least one. Confinement is an excellent advantage. Those things really are horrible. But we did it here; it took months, but they are gone. I had Rat PTSD for weeks after.
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I have a plan. I belive they are demised, and as soon as the plumber fixes the water tube lines, I will line the entire tub with tiny wire mesh, let them try and eat through that. And I will gas them with special rat gas. They also gave me Rat PTSD and nightmares. Those damn tubs are 12K like the one we bought six years ago for 5K. Blowing up an old RV? Cherry Bombs or dynamite?
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Whohoo, putting on the tiny wire mesh is a brainstorm. We attatched it to the cellar and shed doors, and nothing has gotten through it since. This should work!
Ah, the blowing up. Being a Marine, he took the most expedient route. He poured gas all over it and lit a match. I came home from work to find this conflagration in the yard next door; that is, in the woods next to the brook. The doggone rodents started showing up in the neighborhood right after that. All the guys got their guns out.Then they moved to my house, where God, my brother and I erandicated them permanently. I went around quoting Psalm 91 and laying out D-con, and baking soda with sugar. I never want to see another one as long as I live. It was months before I stopped jumping at every little sound. I feel for you and Momo.
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I am purchasing a pellet rifle with special rat pellets. I’ll get them all eventually. The Rat poison works well, but there are still some smart ones that won’t touch it. Now snake season is in full bloom and they are everywhere here in Granbury. Folks are finding Copperheads on their porches, under lawn chairs etc. so we use a high powered flashlight when we go out into the yard at night, plus we both carry 9 mm handguns, but that would do damage to the concrete or our house.
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Wow.
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